Boris’s yellow joisey

THEY say the magnificence of the Tour De France has been spoilt by cheats in recent years. Some cyclists pop and inject performance enhancing drugs, others simply head-butt their rivals as they race to the line.

If they really want that yellow jersey so bad, maybe they should take a few tips from Boris Johnson, the London Mayor who posted what must be a record time on Monday morning for crossing London on two wheels. That’s his story at least.

At the launch of the blue super-highway project for cyclists in Clapham on Monday, he bragged:”I set off from my home in the wilds of North London. And I want you to know I obeyed every  single rule of the road…anyone here following me: Media pack? I stopped like a pillar of salt at every single traffic light. I nearly broke into a sweat. I’d like to know I got here in 35 minutes. I caught up this young chap in an over the top flash Peugeot, leaving him stuck in traffic…all that carbon…he overtook me, I overtook him. I told him, he should have been on a bike on a beautiful  morning like this.”

35 minutes? From his gaff near the Emirates Stadium to Clapham? That’s quite an achievement, Bradley Wiggins would be proud.

Lib Dem councillor Paul Braithwaite – Camden’s bike champ in spirit, if not in official council title any more – did more or less the same journey to get to the launch at his traditional full on pelt. I’d certainly bet on him in a bike race over podgy old Boris, but it took him a time of 40 minutes. Time to call in the race gendarmes methinks..

1 Comment on Boris’s yellow joisey

  1. Tis true! And my journey was a mile and a half shorter than Boris’.

    Boris would have to have averaged 16 mph including all stops (at least three dozen) to do the 10 miles from his home in 35 minutes.

    Stud he may be but trans-London express faster than a cycle courier?

    Liar, liar, (lycra) pants on fire.

    Of course, maybe he set out from someone else’s home…….


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